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  • Writer's pictureA. Guru

#Preteen Survival Guide: “The Tele”

When did I get here? How did she grow so fast?! What happened to bubble guppies??!...

You all, I officially have a preteen!!!!! I‘m so excited about a new level. While I don’t know what all to expect, I am one who chooses to replace fear with preparedness! Since my firstborn, I’ve been determined to get this “moming” gig downpact and I’ve just landed on new turf, ha, ha!!!

It was recently that I noticed the increase in talk time. While it’s just beginning, setting ground rules before it kicks into overdrive is essential when setting your expectations. Today it’s cousins, tomorrow it’s bo-... I dare not!! I think a gray hair just sprouted. Ugh...

Small wins in everyday life lead to overall success. Set the tone before things get hectic to keep consistency and avoid what I like to call “idle areas of weakness”. If there’s a blueprint, there’s something to follow, right?! #winning

Parents, here are three steps to monitoring phone time successfully:

“Set Time”

This is huge! often times, they will try to eat, sleep and breathe with their phone in hand, ha!!! If the could text while walking a tightrope, they would. We create times during the day (free time) where phone time is permitted freely. It is no more than 1 hour in a setting. This works to our advantage because often times, there are other activities that little miss preteen wants to complete and has to effectively manage her time to squeeze in all the fun, hence lessening phone time. See what I did there??! I knew you would! Setting a nightly shut off time at least 2 hours before bed allows them to continue their bedtime routines with ease. It also allows for family moments and replenishment before mental rest; which creates a buffer for possible unfruitful conversations that may have happened prior. What‘s on their mind before bed matters!

“A Secret Errrbody Knows”

Ha, ha!!! Well, at least us as parents. We choose passwords together!!! Both my husband and I sit down with our daughter and come up with passwords for her devices that she chooses. Governing your child’s phones and devices are great ways to gain information on who, what, when, where and how! If you aren’t in the know, you can’t help them to properly grow. Even though they are evolving, they are still in our care to nurture, protect and educate. Knowing what they know is important in the journey.

“Content Review”

Monitoring their usage and what they are viewing, hearing and providing (their actions) is super important in being practice. My husband does ”ghost” review for video streaming, websites, etc. We often come together with our beauty and review what’s in her phone together. We discuss the content and help her understand what is and isn’t appropriate. We PRAISE her when we see good choices being exercised. One YouTube video can be great and the next thing you know, its gone all the way left! Who can relate?! WHAT IS VIEWED SHAPES THE MIND. Be intentional on helping them understand the why. If you don’t know the why, learn together!

Them knowing you are there, makes a world of difference in openness and understanding from all parties involved. You may not be the fave right now, but you’ll be thanked for your vigilance later! You may even thank yourself. Growing together is where it’s at. It’s not enough to say “because I said so!”. While, yes, that’s the absolute truth, raising young men and women that know the why’s create critical, independent and strong thinkers that will be able to successfully navigate making great choices because they have an understanding of the effects vs. doing because of force or mindlessly; which can result in making improper choices from a place of rebellion a lot sooner than we’d like.

Go and grow parents! We’re in this together! Have a #preteentip? Share and be featured!


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